I know, my title seems senile, but I promise you it’s not, LOL! I’m just honest. We hear so much about dating and relationships these days that it seems like the only cure to the madness is remaining single. Then again, who likes quiet walks in the park or dinner out, ALONE?? Yeah, we all like our solitude, but the hope is to find someone that can interrupt it from time to time. So we date.
I don’t think I realized how jacked up dating really was until after I divorced. It was crystal clear that the tides had turned and I had no life jacket and I sure as heck didn’t know how to surf or swim. It was scary. Every time I thought I had the courage to get back out there, I panicked and renigged.
Don’t even get me started on online dating. Dear lord, the tangled web of deception that whole world weaves would leave anyone considering going into priesthood. As I got my feet wet, I honestly met a ton of interesting people. I enjoyed it. I mean, I enjoyed dating. What I didn’t enjoy was the people.
I think we all can consider an experience enjoyable if the conversation is interesting and engaging, even if there is no romantic outcome. The problem comes in when grown men and women turn dating into a charade of sports that they’ve created to feed their ego of insecurity at the expense of innocent people who just wanted to have a good time. Then it dawned on me. People date for one of two reasons: To truly find love or because they truly love to find. Let me explain.
Romantic love is such a captivating experience that for those who are void of it, finding it seems like chasing the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Many of us can imagine the nights at home on the couch snuggled up with a significant other watching a movie or just feeling the rhythm of their heartbeat when you embrace. The thought is so hypnotic that people become addicted to finding love with no intention of accepting the responsibility that love brings. They just like the high. But for those looking to truly find love, the high isn’t good enough. You want the real thing badder than you want Dasani on a hot sunny day. Dating has no restrictions or boundaries. It has no vetting process, so you mix these two groups of people up and it leads me back to my title.
Dating is about finding love. Discovering what you don’t want so you recognize what you do. The tough thing is that no one comes with a sign over their head that helps you determine which dating group they subscribe to. So what can you do about it? NOTHING! Just be brave enough to keep trying. Don’t let people with the wrong motives discourage you. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither is love!